yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
