Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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