Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Randomize
