just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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