I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
