girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Randomize
