I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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