So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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