Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
