She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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