She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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