She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize