In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize
