when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Shitshow foam night was such a success
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
