wat bout pragnant strippers??
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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