Can Purell be used as lube?
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
We have started to decorate penises.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
