If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
