my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
