i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
