my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
