On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Randomize
