just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
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