is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
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