when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
home. puking in laundry basket.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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