I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize