i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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