For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Randomize
