Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
