I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
