She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
