I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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