he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Randomize
