just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
