Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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