Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
