Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Screwed.edu
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
