she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize
