i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
