I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
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