I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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