When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Randomize
