sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
