its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
