watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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