Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I FOUND THE LEGS
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
