pedialite and red bull = repair kit
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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