idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
