afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
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