he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
