i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Randomize
